Monday Male

Riaan is an IT Technical Manager and a computer fundi aka geek. He also just happens to be my Boerewors and the father of my two beautiful girls. We have been married for 10 years and together for twelve. He is the love of my life and so he also deserves a Star Spot on my Monday Male. Riaan constantly puts up with hearing stories about people he doesn’t know (my fellow Blog Friends in Bloggerville) and has had to deal with my obsession with blogging for two and a half years. He deserves a Blog Award for that one!! He helps me edit my html format from time to time, although I’ve become quite good with that too.What’s it like being married to a 5 foot nothing Scottish redhead? Well, what can a say, Scottish woman are feisty! Wouldn’t have it any other way though. Just as quick as her temper flairs up, just as quick it comes down. She is the love of my life and I am very lucky to have found her. She is the mother of my two beautiful daughters and she gives me everything I need.What’s she like as a Mum? Her kids means everything to her, she will go out her way to do anything for them, sometimes to her own demise. Kaylin has the knack of getting the better of her every now and then! She’s always cleaning up after the kids when they made a mess, with lots of complaining, but she still does it. She always thinks of the small little things that makes their life so much easier. On BloggingWhat do you think of her blog and her blogging? At first I didn’t take much notice of it, was something to keep her busy. Now my mom, dad, sister and my brother (he’s in London) looks at her blog to see what we are up to. I guess it’s “our” little place in the interwebs to tell everybody what we doing and that we are still alive!What’s the biggest challenge you deal with regarding this? I sometimes have to fight for some of her time, most of the time when she gets home she plays with the kids while I cook. After we done eating she jumps on her blog to approve her comments and post her days events etc. Then it’s bath time for the kids and sleep time, by then we both are dead tired and just hit the bed to get some rest. Just so that we can repeat it all the next day!Did you buy her a laptop so she could blog anywhere and everywhere? She was always complaining that she wanted to sit in front of the TV or lay in bed at night to “blog”. So for her birthday I got her a laptop (and keep her from hogging my PC) so that she could blog wherever she wants. At least I got some brownie points for buying her a laptop!On FamilyWhat is the most important lesson you’ve learnt by becoming a dad? I always tell people that you have never experience love until you have kids. It’s just such an unconditional love that one has for your kids, you just can’t explain it.Oh and before we had kids, you see the dads taking the half eaten sweets from their kids and eating it and you think - “I will NEVER do that!” Well, half eaten sweets aren’t that bad to be honest!Whats the most important lesson you can teach your children? NEVER trust strangers! Unfortunately this is the day and age we live in, sad but true!That they can speak to me about ANYTHING, they must be able to trust me and I won’t be angry if they did something wrong. On WorkHave you always been a computer geek? Yes I have, I can remember I was in Standard 5 (Grade 7) and I said to my dad, “One day I will work with computers” It’s always been my passion.Did you trying and built computers as a child? Since I can remember I've been “tinkering” with computers.What is the most exciting project you’ve worked on as an IT person? In 2000 when I was working for IBM, I was sent to North Carolina in the USA for 4 weeks to write a book with 2 other guys. It was a very nerve wrecking experience but one of the most exciting moments in my life. Having your name printed in a book!What would be your perfect job? Where I have to do as little as possible and get as much as possible?! I’m always trying something new to make money, who knows! Maybe one day I’ll hit the jackpot!On womenHave you ever written a poem for your sweetheart? My poem writing ability is not be one of my strong points.  I have stopped counting how many poems I have started and deleted cause I just couldn’t find the words I was looking for. However there has been a few poems that finally reached my sweetheart.Does love at first sight exist? Yes I believe in love at first sight! We are a good example of that! Gillian and I moved in together after only 3 months!Boy shorts or g-string? G-stings for the win, boy shorts on a woman just don’t do it for me.What are your five non-negotiable in a woman? Be alive?  This is a tricky question as I believe it’s the whole package that makes the woman and not just specific things.Bum or boobs man? Both!On randomnessWhat song would you choose as the soundtrack of your life? Butterfly Kisses - Bob Carlisle.One thing you like about living in SA? It’s such a beautiful country and has so much to offer, stunning weather and amazing country sides. So many people live here but never explore what SA has to offer.Thank you, Babe for finally agreeing to do Monday Male, even though you complained bitterly that there were "too many questions". 

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Childhood Friends

I recently found a Group on FB that made me smile and brought back sweet memories.Sunnyside Primary School in Pretoria

This is the school I attended when we first arrived in South Africa from Scotland.  I was 9 years old and I arrived toward the middle of their school year.  A brand new country, a brand new school, a whole different way of living....Everything was so new and foreign to me that I honestly thought my classmates were speaking another language.  I was initimiated and confused by the accent because it was so different and I had a hard time understanding it initially but I soon got the hang of things and started making friends.

I was the new foreign red head with the funny accent.  Ironic because I was the one who thought they sounded funny.

I didn't recognise any names at first in the FB Group, except for one wee boy who had posted a picture of himself as I remembered him.  From there, I found classmates who's surnames had changed and they remembered me.  

It took me back almost thirty years and the memories came flooding back.  Playing marbles with the boys in the dig outs on the playground, playing elastics with the girls and swapping pretty writing papers.  Attending parties and having my first crushes on boys. 

The great news is that we're having a reunion brunch at the end of the month to get together, catch up and share old photos from that time.

I then took a chance and went to find classmates from my primary school in Scotland - Bellfield Primary School but I couldnt' find anyone as there is no dedicated group.  I'll be adding one soon.  I dug out my old Bellfield Primary School T-Shirt today (the only item of clothing I have kept for 35 years).  I put it on Kaylin (my four year old) and took a picture of her wearing it. 

More memories came flooding back.  This time memories of school in Scotland and the friends I had there, playing violin and drying our pokees on the radiator when it snowed....

Have you kept in contact with anyone from primary school?

Kaylin wearing my 35 year old primary school t-shirt

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Equals Three - Ray William Johnson

Still love watching RWJ's stuff

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Happy Fourth Birthday KK!!

You’re four todayDynamite in a tiny packageYou look like an angelYou fooled us all.You are stubborn as a muleYour tantrums make our ears bleed.You terrorise our poor cat, PicklesAnd pour shampoo into your shoesYou love Hannah MontanaCupcakes and all things pink I love you no matter whatMy little tiny girl-monsterHow we eat our birthday cake!

Kaylin with her Birthday Crown

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Funky Hair Friday and Update

I sprayed our hair blue today and took some pictures....Kaylin took cupcakes to her school today for her wee friends as she's turning four tomorrow.  They got to celebrate her birthday a day early.  My baby is turning four.  Can you belive it?  Gosh, I feel old.

Today was a pretty shitey day overall.  Riaan got his final verdict from the company that he's been employed with for seven months and they have dismissed him.  We still can't believe it!  Its been a long 5 weeks at home for him worrying about his job.

He was out of the blue slapped with a suspension five weeks ago pending an investigation from the company's side.  It was a week and a half before he even knew was the charges were!  After he knew what the chargers were, he requested access to his emails to do his own investigation.  Then the light went on and he knew what it was all about.  He'd missed a request on the bottom an email to do something (he was pretty busy on another project).  One little mistake and he's been charged with Deregation!BS  ....total BS!!!Especially since he has no formal job description, has had no formal hand-over from the guy who was supposed to be assisting him settle into his new position at the company.  At no time did they call him in to discuss why he didn't follow the instruction.  No counselling was given to him.  No verbal warning, no written warning, nothing!He had a disciplinary hearing that lasted from 9am in the morning until 4:30pm in the afternoon and he was totally shattered when he got home.  He has no company representative as he's only been there 7 months and doesn't have a strong trusting relationship with anyone there.  He's had to wait an entire week for the findings and the verdict from the Chairperson.  More waiting and worrying...Emotionally it has taken its toll on him.  He is a broken man at the moment....he's so demotivated, so desponded and very down.  Its been exhausting for me trying to keep him in good spirits as well as trying to keep it from the girls, my dad's car accident, my mum in the hospital and all this amongst our Expo (the busiest time of my working year).I'm drained, my Boerewors is depressed and its a tense household right now.  We don't know how we're going to get through the next month with no salary from my Boerewors.  We may have to sell our belowed Ford Focus ST to make ends meet.He wants to contest it all.  He wants to appeal but I'm not sure he has the energy for it.  One day he has the anger in him to fight them, the next day he's like, Woteva and couldn't be bothered going through it all again... I hope he finds some fight within him and take the company to the CCMA for unfair dismissal.  I know he has a case as he clearly got the short end of the stick.  They wanted rid of him somehow for something and we don't know who has stabbed him in the back or why.  There is no closure for him.  He is the first to admit when he's done something wrong but one little mistake and you're out?  Its just doesn't seem fair.Give a guy a break!

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Freaky Friday - Episode 13 Sir Lick-a-Lot

No Theme today...just general Freak Fuckers!Anorexic Teletubbies with a Proctologist?Who Told this bloke that Blue Suede shoes would got with this outfit? It sooo clashes with that orange vest, doll! Thorn amongst the roses (with clipboard, ginger beard and backpack)

 

WTF?  He's got better legs than she has!

 

Super Fairy Geek?

Can I nibble on your cheese?  

or do you want to be the cat and you can chase me?

Write your own caption for this one...

Has Knife, Will Stab (guess who? yip The Daft Scots Lass)

A Mexican  MacDonalds...

 

Even on oxygen this old geezer has fucking attitude!

Sir Lick-a-lot

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Unspoken Communication for Girls

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Blog Challenge - Your First Memory

What is your earliest Memory?One of my earliest memories is camping with my family up in the Scottish Highlands and it was always so frikken cold and windy there.  We all went for a family walk up the rolling hills and we came across an old farm tractor.  Janie, my older sister ran ahead of me to sit in the driver's seat.  I was little so I obviously couldn't run as fast.  I threw a tantrum because Janie was hogging the tractor seat and steering wheel.  I must've been about 2 years old.  I eventually got my turn in the drivers seat and turning the steering wheel.  Later in the day, karma came to bite me and I fell face first into a fresh Highland Coo Patty (aka Cow Shite).Lovely!After that, I remember clearly being in the Bellfield (Scotland) post office standing in the queue and asking my  mum "Mum, How Old Are You?".  My mum replied "I'm 34".  So I must've been about 4 years old.  I remember the dark little cramped post office like it was yesterday, the people, the mumbling of people's chatter, the smells, the Royal Mail posters on the walls, the warmth of holding my mum's hand.  She had long strawberry blonde hair then and I thought she looked so pretty that day!

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Doesn't Come Cheap

A businessman walks into a bank in San Francisco and asks for the loan officer. He says he is going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $7,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan. So the businessman hands over the keys to a Rolls Royce parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything checks out, and the bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. An employee drives the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the businessman returns, repays the $7,000 and the interest, which comes to $19.67. The loan officer says, "We are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little confused. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What confuses us is why would you bother to borrow $7,000?" The businessman replied, "Where else in San Francisco can I park my car for two weeks for $20 bucks?"

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Blog Award

A Big tthanks to Green Eyed Momster for the Beautiful Blogger Award.  Its always great to receive these awards - never fails to put a smile on my face - and so does your blog~

The rules are now I have to tell you five things that I like and pass the award on to five fellow bloggers.  This is always hard for me because I follow about 150 blogs and read them daily.  If I missed you this time, there will always be a next time.

1.  I like to sit quietly with a cuppa tea, peppermint crisp and a fag.

 

2.  I like spending time with friends and family - sharing a glass of wine and a chat.  I dont know what I'd do without my friends!  You all know who you are.

3.  I like my wee blog and blogging.  It makes me feel as if my heart and soul is "out there" and I get support from the most awesome fellow readers and bloggers who have become quite close to my heart.  I heart y'all.

4.  I like the fact that I have found old school friends on Facebook and they are sharing the most amazing old photos with me.  It makes me smile, laugh and brings back good memories.

5.  I like getting into bed every night.  I love lying down on the cool linen, my head on my soft duck down pillow underneath the ceiling fan, saying my prayers, closing my eyes and drifting into blissful sleep where I have the most amazing dream adventures.

Now I have to pass this award onto five other Beautiful Bloggers.

Here they are:

Beautiful Blueviolent over at A Nut in a Nutshell

Whispering Writer from Airing my Dirty Laundry One Sock at a Time 

Being Brazen

Nancy from F8hasit  

Texan Gal Fragrant Liar

I shoulda been a stripper by Chrissy Starr (her Stipper name)

Give these gorgeous gals a visit why donchya!

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Monday Male

Meet Brian Miller who is a fellow blogger that I visit often.  His poetry inspires me.  Brian is very happily married and is dad of two gorgeous and adventurous boys. My life is a storybook, and most likely yours is as well. Its all in how we tell it. I like mine as an Action / Adventure / Romance?  I have lived, loved, lost and when I was not expecting it, love found me. At the time, she was a ballerina and I was getting out of the hospital from trying to run myself into the ground with bad lifestyle choices. She walked through the door and I turned to the friend next to me and told him I was going to marry her one day. We kissed in the snow and exchanged numbers written in orange colored pencil because that is all we could find. Somehow, this led me to dancing in the Nutcracker, though I will never admit to wearing tights. Really I did not, it was billowy Arabian guard pants with just a little vest off the shoulders. Sorry no pictures survived. Dancing together did wonders for our early relationship though? heat & rhythm tease at the edge of me, as she lays against my chest, sliding along my arms, until only our fingertips touch, carrying the spark, then spinning away, takes my breathe with her, prancing, begging chase, i am helplessly but to pursue my swan princess, dancing en pointe upon my heart leaving rhythm & heat. Passion is something that seems to wane in so many marriages. Its not all physical, but you can't really lose that either. On a regular basis, I try to find new ways to show my wife how much she means to me, whether it's a note, or writing about her or even doing the dishes (gasp). It is all about the pursuing. She is the best thing that ever happened to me and should be treated that way. Currently I am a therapist with kids that are at risk of being removed from their home. Every day is a new challenge so it keeps it interesting. I worked in the corporate world for many years in management and training and also worked for the church. All of my jobs, in some way, have revolved around helping people. It's my superhero complex.  But really, no tights.I started Waystationone about 17 months ago. The first 6 to 7 months I was just vomiting facts about my life which I'll admit was rather boring. I decided to start telling stories from my life to one day share with my boys in hopes that they can glean some wisdom.  About 90 to 95% of my blog posts are true stories of my family and people I have met. Everyone has to find their own style and voice though. Along the way, a few friends have joined my journey, which I am eternally thankful.  It is amazing to me the friendships that can develop between people that have never met beyond the blogosphere.  Like any relationship though, these don't just happen.  You have to work at it. Many of my best blog friends were met through Theme Thursday or Flash 55. On nice days, you will usually find me in the woods or off on some adventure with T and the boys, my notebook in my back pocket to collect the stories.  I also enjoy reading and I am working on my first book right now.  If there is anything I hope you get out of a visit to the waystation, it is that we really are much the same.  Our stories may be different, but we have faced many of the same challenges and as we walk together, maybe we can help each other avoid the potholes. Hope to see you soon. Thanks Gillian for the honor of being your Monday Male!If you love poetry, visit his blog and leave a comment or two.

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Before and After Booby Greed

BeforeNext month with be The Twins' 2nd Birthday.I don't regret for one day that I had my boobs done.I came across this picture the other day while going through old shots, and it just reminds me of why I did it.  Thats just fucking sad...Now, don't get me wrong, I was quite happy with my size 34B boobettes before I had my girls.  But after breastfeeding both of them, they were NEVER the same.  In fact, they disappeared to barely an A cup.   I started calling the bee stings on my chest - my "skin flaps" or my "wet teabags".  They were fucking pathetic, droopy and so damn ugly.  I couldn't look in the mirror at myself let alone prance around in low cut tops flashing my lack of cleveage.  I never had anything to fill them out.  Now I do.My only regret is that I didn't go bigger - yeah, its called Booby Greed, alright?  Dont judge me - you don't know me.  I'm not shy to admit I love a good pair of knockers and admire others' mammories all the time.  After my 350cc silicone implantsTime for an Upgrade???

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2010 Gauteng Homemakers Expo

2010 Gauteng Homemakers Expo was a big success.Saturday was pretty busy and the isles were chock-a-block with visitors.  It was aweseome!

The 2010 Fifa Fine Arts Collection including the 4 metre bronze statue that I told you about earlier in the week that lost a leg during the Build-up of the Expo.

This was our Decor on a Budget feature area which was gorgeous.

I loved this "room" which they created.  The tables are rounds of sliced up tree trunks painted.  The same with the side tables which were mounted on "legs".  The lampshades were upsidedown chrome buckets and brightly coloured broom handles were the stands. I just adore the cow painting, the crate shelves on the wall and the ribbon curtains.  The carpet was painted with blackboard paint and they wrote funky slogans and vintage song lyrics on it with chalk.  Very original!!

I then stumbled across Rooikop's bags again this year in our Design for Living Feature area.  This fellow red head makes bags from recycle plastic carrier bags.  Awesome stuff!  I still wanna get me one!

While walking through the expo taking pix, I came across Ann Gadd's "For Ewe" stand which displayed her paintings and her books.  I stood there for ages going through every single one giggling out loud.  Eventually she came up to me and asked if she could help me.  I told her I was admiring her clever and entertaining paintings and that I hadn't enjoyed such a good laugh in ages.  Her stuff is genius!

Eventually, I just had to buy one of her paintings and there were so many good ones I couldn't decided on just ONE.  I sent a friend back today to buy more...isn't her stuff just adorable?  I couldn't help myself and bought her book as well ...

My new Ann Gadd painting

Her book in my grubby paws.

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Yet Another Update

Mum has been diagnosed with diabetes that she could probably control with her diet at this stage.  No insulin is needed yet but the Dietician has been around to give my mum an Eating Plan to stick to.  They want to keep her in to get her sugar levels balanced and under control and then she can go home.  Oh crikey, I just wish I could be there to give her a big cuddle and kiss...Riaan's hearing has been going on all day!  He is emotionally and physically exhausted.  They've hauled out the Big Guns and are trying to nail him on every tiny little thing that has happened during the 7 months that he's been with the firm.  Its ridiculous...surely attacking his integrity is not legal?  Best of all, none of this was even discussed with him first, he was just slapped with a Gross Misconduct Disciplinary Hearing.  I'm so angry with them.  Gross Misconduct is serious and all the charges against him certainly cannot be categoriesed as GM.  He is representing himself and he surely isn't a Lawyer.  I hope he said enough to save his job to at least bide us time so that he can find other work.  If not,  it will be off to the CCMA for an Appeal.  Final closing statements and mitigating circumstances will be on Monday *sigh*...and the saga continues for us all...   I'm knackered.

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Barnyard Artists for Footprints Benefit Concert

A Benefit Concert will be held on 6 June 2010 at 8pm at the Banyard Theatre Broadacres.  Tickets are R150 each and every cent goes to The Footprints Childrens Centre.  15 Rockin' Artists on stage.  How can you miss it????One of the incredibly talented artists will be Ramaine Barreiro-Lloyd who is currently playing at The Royal Boma Theatre in Alberton in the show called Broadway Rocks which I saw this month and she ROCKS!!!To book tickets for this Footprints Benefit Concert HERE go to Computicket and book online or phone (011)4676983.Join the Facebook Group and see you there!

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Freaky Friday - Episode 13 - Walmart

Hi Freakyazoid Fuckers.  This week's Theme is : Weirdosweird·oplay_w2("W0082900") n. pl. weird·oes Slang

1. A person regarded as being very strange or eccentric.

2. A deranged, potentially dangerous person.

We all have at least one weird family member that everyone sniggers about behind their back. You know the poor Fucker?  The freak that everyone dreads seeing at the annual family Christmas Picnic?  The cock-sucker who never fails to embarras you in public.

I personally have many dysfunctional family members and I think thats why my Mum brought us up to have a sense of humour about life and people...

Uncle George who doesn't own a toothbrush and insists on slobbery mouth to mouth greetings *shiver* or Cousin Sebastian who wears a bow tie with his PJs and loves his job as an Embalmer.  He'll go into great depth about the process to anyone who'll listen.  No one gives a rats arse, Seb!  

Then there is Great Aunt Edna who wears knitting needles in her hair, smells like fucking moth balls, constantly mumbles the word fuck all the time and farts like a fucking two-stroke.

I am drawn to these kind of Fuck Nuts even though most others avoid them.  I find them incredibly interesting - physically putrid and vile, yes, but - colourful nevertheless.  I especially like the weirdos that don't give a fucking rats arse what others think of them.  They are confident about themselves, the way they are and they don't see anything freaky about themselves.  In fact, they generally think that "The Average Joe" is the weirdo.

They don't like to be labeled and they certainly DON'T like being kept in a box. Weirdos fucking rock my tits off and are certainly no Shrinking Violets.

And this reminded me of the Walmart People.  These Plonkers not only fit this category but show no embarassment in their weirdo skin....I FUCKIN love 'em!!!

Here are a few WM Peeps:

The typical Walmart Mullet Man 

Looking ultra cool his shades, crop top and short jean-pant.  

A bad-ass heart tattoo on his bicep completes the 80's rock look.

The gut hanging over the jean-shorts just puts a cherry on the fucking cake.

The lead singer of Funkadelic shoppin' for the reunion party.

Everyone owns a pair of Yellow Go-Go Boots, right?

Pimp My Cereal:   "Slappin' Dem Skank-Ass Ho's works up quite an appetite..."

Who is the Weirdo in your Dysfunctional Family? Tell me about it...

Go to Weirdo Dot Com for a laugh.

Are you a Weirdo? Take the Quiz and find out!

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A quick Update

My wee lass lost her front tooth this morning.  Mum yanked on it and out it came so we have the Tooth Fairy coming to visit us tonight.  My Mum was rushed to hospital yesterday after not feeling too great when her and my dad went to the mall.  They immediately took her to the Nurse at the Shopping Mall who called the paramedics after puting her on a drip.  My mum has been admitted to hospital with pnuemonia and possible diabetes.  She is on an antibiotic drip for her chest infection, receiving oxygen and nebuliser two to three times a day.   The doc did the blood work this morning as he suspects she has diabetes and we are waiting for the results so that they can start insulin.  How on earth do you get diabetes at 67 years old? I'm stuck at The Dome working until Monday and Mum is soooo far away....Speaking of working, the 2010 Fifa Fine Arts Collection arrived at our exhibition on Tuesday and some fekker broke the leg off the offical 4 metre Bronze Statue that's supposed to be unveiled at a media and press function on Friday night at the Expo!  Did I piss myself laughin'  or what?   I had a good giggle watching them weld the leg back on to our offical soccer statue - bad omen????......only in Africa....anywhere else in the world this piece would be handled with kid-gloves.Riaan's hearing at work is tomorrow...Busy, hectic, stressful week.  I'll need either a week off at the Spa (wishful thinking) after all this or Sleep Therapy!

My Wee Toothless wonder

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Making Mountains Outta Moles

I have ugly moles on my face which I have been wanting to have removed for years.I've always been worried about the scarring because they are quite big but I've gotten to the point that I'd rather have the scars on my face.  Having these ugly fuckers on my face waving at everyone are distrating and very unattactive.  I'm also worried that they will become a problem in the future.I have on my on right cheek, one above my lip on the right side.  I also have one in my right eyebrow and a smallish one above my lip on the left side. I'm have an appointment with the dermatologist on 4th March to have them zapped!

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